


All in Knots

by bertee



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Football player!Jared, Homophobia, Knitting, M/M, Modeling, Photography, past bullying, shy!Jensen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-02
Updated: 2012-09-02
Packaged: 2017-11-17 05:23:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/548062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bertee/pseuds/bertee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>College AU. Football player!Jared is in the running to model shy!Jensen's latest knitwear.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All in Knots

"What did you do?"

Danneel nudged the door shut with her hip. "Got tacos?"

Tucked up on the couch, Jensen aimed a glare in her direction. "You know what I'm talking about."

"Nope," she said. "Still just a psych major. Not an actual psychic." She breezed past him to dump the tacos on the table, ruffling his hair as she went. "What's up? Why do you have Humperdinck face?"

Humperdinck belonged to Danneel's girlfriend. He was a very angry cat.

Jensen scowled and twitched his nose. "I don't have Humperdick face." It was hard to maintain his displeasure when Danneel waved a taco under his nose and he snagged it from her fingers before tossing her his phone. "And this is what's up."

"Your Iron Man screensaver?" She tilted her head. "I don't know, that suit looks kinda constrictive."

"What? No," Jensen muttered, snatching the phone back. Iron Man disappeared when he clicked through to his messages and he brandished the phone in Danneel's face. "Look!"

There was a smudge of guacamole on Danneel's nose when she put her taco down and looked at Jensen's inbox.

Jensen couldn't help but feel vindicated when her eyebrows rose. 

"Wow," she said with a grin. "See, I told you guys would be into that whole dork thing one day. Congrats on reaching your sexual peak."

Aside from some unfortunate decisions last Halloween, Jensen's love life definitely fell more in the 'sexual plateau' category and he narrowed his eyes as Danneel kept scrolling through his messages. "And you had nothing to do with this?"

"Nope," Danneel said around a mouthful of taco. "All you, Ackles."

"Right. Because a bunch of the most attractive guys here just suddenly decided to send me shirtless pictures of themselves. That's a normal thing that happens."

"Maybe it's some kind of unexplained phenomenon," Danneel said, showing Jensen way more of her food than he wanted to see. "Like that movie with the birds. Except with nipples."

She beamed. Danneel was a girl who really liked nipples.

"Is that right?" Jensen deadpanned. "'Cause for an unexplained phenomenon, they all seem really determined to book some kind of modeling job."

Danneel's gaze dropped to her lap and Jensen couldn't hold back a little flail of triumph. "I knew it! I knew you were behind this!"

"Jen-"

"What did you do, Danneel?" An unpleasant thought occurred. "I'm not going to get a bunch of guys trying to buy me for sex, am I? I know you have this thing about getting me out of my shell but surprise prostitution really isn't the best solution."

"Those were two words I had honestly never put together," Danneel said. "I'm not about to whore you out, I promise." She gave a little shrug. "I might have mentioned that you were looking for some dude models for your next patterns."

Jensen froze. "You what?"

"I only told a couple of people!" she said. "Like two or three or twenty, tops."

"Danneel-"

"Jensen." She knocked her shoulder against his and wiped the guacamole off her nose. "Come on, Ackles. We've been talking about doing a guy version for weeks now."

" _You_ 've been talking." He looked down, feeling familiar anxiety creep up his throat once again. "This whole thing was a bad idea."

"Tough shit," Danneel said fondly. She snuggled in closer, settling herself in against his side. "And it was an awesome idea. You get to keep knitting yourself an entire wardrobe while making a few bucks on the side, and the rest of the student body gets to broaden their wool horizons. It's a win-win."

"I don't think 'broaden their wool horizons' is the technical term for it," he said, twisting his fingers in the bottom of his sweatervest. "You know, none of this would've happened if you hadn't stolen my scarf and gotten naked."

"I know," she said with a smile. "You can thank me any time you like."

It had started last fall. After finally escaping high school and getting through his freshman year of college relatively unscathed, Jensen had been happy with his life. Sure, he was still kind of reclusive but he'd found a part time job in the library, was getting good grades and had some people who might have considered him a friend. It was progress.

And then Danneel, Gen and Misha had gotten drunk, purloined various items of clothing, and conducted an impromptu modeling session in the photography studio. Jensen was still hazy on the details but nudity had clearly been involved somehow, given that the most popular picture of the set turned out to be the one of Danneel smiling coyly into the camera with Jensen's favorite scarf wrapped strategically around her bare chest.

While the interest in Danneel's breasts was not surprising, the interest in Jensen's scarf definitely was. 

It had been hand-knitted during his many late-night shifts at the library, which had earned him plenty of judgmental looks from certain patrons. However, evidently scarves were much more appealing when worn by a hot girl rather than being knitted by a dorky guy, and Danneel had received dozens of requests for the pattern. 

Things had spiraled from there. 

With the help of Misha's connections at the print shop, Danneel's enthusiasm for posing naked with knitwear, and Humperdinck's gracious decision not to shred every scarf he got his paws on, they had printed and sold batch after batch of knitting patterns with accompanying risque pictures.

(Jensen had felt a little uncomfortable about his new role as a producer of niche softcore pornography but was reassured by the number of times he saw people actually wearing stuff they'd made from the patterns. Apparently there was a significant section of the student body that was into both knitting and half-naked women.)

"So you told people we were doing a male one?"

"Yep." Danneel put on a serious face. "Straight women and gay dudes want something to look at too, y'know." 

Jensen tucked his legs underneath him. "You know porn exists, right? I hear there's lots of it on the internet."

"Oh, you hear, do you?" She elbowed him in the side. "Are we just pretending I never caught you jacking off to 'Sweaty Gay Football Dudes 4'?"

"I wasn't jacking off!" Jensen protested, feeling his cheeks go red. "And it wasn't called that."

"Aw, baby." 

Jensen batted her hand away before she could ruffle his hair. He adjusted his glasses and folded his arms as Danneel went back to her taco. 

"And yeah," she continued, "I know the internet is for porn, but this is way better than that. This way you get to ogle hot guys _and_ knit yourself a sweatervest. That's gotta be like nirvana for you."

"Shut up."

"I'm just saying." Settling back on the couch, she tipped her head back to look up to the ceiling. "Anyway, what if there are other guys out there like you? Are you really going to deny them a chance at total dorky happiness?"

Jensen looked at her sideways. "Are you trying to guilt-trip me into printing knitting patterns with half-naked dudes on them?"

Danneel grinned. "Is it working?"

His phone vibrated again, this time delivering a picture of meaty thighs belonging to Todd from the volleyball team, and Jensen sighed. "Maybe. I mean, I have volunteers already." He frowned. "You didn't say I'd pay them, did you?"

"Totally voluntary," she confirmed. "Most of them want to do it because they think it'll get them laid. Like those calendars with the half-naked firemen or with guys dressed as sexy Wizard of Oz characters."

Jensen blinked. "You have the weirdest interests."

Ignoring the interruption, she flashed him a hopeful smile. "So is that a yes?"

"I don't know," he said honestly. "I just like knitting things, Danneel. I don't know what to do with any of this."

He waved his phone in her direction and let her snag it from his fingers. 

"Well, it's lucky you've got me," she said, thumbing through the messages. "I'll pick one and you can photograph them wearing the scarves and whatever. No muss, no fuss, and minimal awkward social interaction on your part."

"You'll pick?"

"You mean look through pictures of half-naked men to decide which one would look best in your little pink sweater? Hell yeah, I'll pick."

"It's peach," Jensen said. He really liked his sweater. "And I thought you were a lesbian."

"And? It's not like gay guys don't have opinions on female models," she said, chomping down the last mouthful of taco. "I can eat pussy and judge how attractive men would be in pink sweaters. I'm multi-talented like that."

"Peach." 

"Whatever." She pushed herself to her feet. "I'm going to steal your phone and start judging our candidates. We should have a shortlist for you by tomorrow."

"We?"

"Me and Humperdinck," she said, as though it was obvious that the world's angriest cat moonlighted as a casting agent. "And maybe Gen if she gets back from the lab in time." She leaned over to kiss him on the forehead. "Just relax, okay? Play some computer games, judge YouTube commenters for their choices, watch more sweaty football porn. Y'know, normal stuff."

"I don't-"

"Then come by tomorrow after class for the shortlist." She beamed. "I promise I will have a list of top quality manmeat for you to choose from."

There was a short, awkward silence while they dealt with her word choices.

Danneel wrinkled her nose. "Yeah, never saying that again." 

She kissed him again and made a beeline for the door. 

"See you tomorrow!" she called over her shoulder. "Try not to freak out!"

The door slammed shut behind her. 

Jensen promptly freaked out.

**+++**

On the inside, Danneel's apartment was awesome. The couch was comfortable, the TV was huge, and there were enough neat photography prints on the walls to keep Jensen occupied for hours.

On the outside, however, it looked like someone had stapled an egg box to a crack den, and so Jensen didn't loiter out there for too long. (Danneel swore her weird neighbor, Augustus, didn't actually eat people. Jensen remained unconvinced.)

His chances of survival did see a minor improvement when he stepped through the door to be greeted with a simultaneous "Hi!" from Danneel and Genevieve. Danneel was cross-legged on the floor, surrounded by pictures, while Gen surveyed from the couch with a notebook.

Humperdinck was reclining on the other side of the couch. Jensen took the chair.

"That…" He gulped. "That's a lot of pictures."

Danneel waved her hand. "It's fine. We've eliminated most of them."

That sounded more assassin-like than Jensen was comfortable with. "Oh. Good. Did you pick one?"

"We got it down to five," Gen chimed in. "But we wanted your input before we made the final choice." She beckoned him over and patted the couch beside her. "Here. We got pizza."

Against his better judgment, Jensen inched over to the couch. Humperdinck didn't take his eyes off Jensen as he scraped his claws against the cushion in a steady rhythm. "Uh, the cat…"

Gen rolled her eyes. "I don't know why you're all so scared of him," she said, scooping the cat up with one hand. "C'mere, Dinck."

Humperdinck went with ease. He bumped his head up under Gen's chin, rubbing himself happily against her, before settling down as a furry lapwarmer and fixing Jensen with a death glare.

"See?" Gen said, scritching behind his ears. "He's a sweetheart. Aren't you, baby?"

Danneel looked over her shoulder in Jensen's direction and mouthed a silent 'No'.

Not wanting to incite yet another argument about whether there was a cat version of the antichrist, Jensen took a slice of pizza and looked down at the pictures. "Which ones are the last five?"

"Right here." Danneel gestured to the five badly lit headshots in front of her. "Number one: Brent. Nice eyes, nice chest, really great ass. Plus he won some triathlon thing last summer so, y'know, stamina." 

"Danneel's been very thorough with her research," Gen informed him.

"Like you didn't help." Danneel looked to Jensen. "She made a spreadsheet. It was color-coded."

"I'm a scientist," Gen said. "I like doing things properly."

This was said while stroking Humperdinck and did nothing to change Jensen's predictions that Gen would end up as a real life supervillain one day. She already had the henchcat.

"Thanks for the research," he cut in, "but it's a no on Brent." At their confused expressions, he explained, "He's really homophobic. Came close to punching me just for looking at him wrong."

"Fuck, really? What an asshole." Danneel ripped his picture in two and tossed it over to the litter box, where Humperdinck immediately pounced on it, like the trained killer he was. "I take back everything nice I said about his ass."

"Go on to number three," Gen said, snagging another slice of pizza. "I like number three."

"Number two," Danneel said pointedly over Gen's sigh, "Misha."

Jensen stared at her. "Misha? Our Misha?"

"Apparently he wants a chance to pose naked with scarves too," Danneel said, "and I felt bad cutting him." She looked around for support. "He's kind of hot, right?"

Gen made a non-committal noise. "Did he send you a headshot?"

"Yup." Danneel held it up. "It's kind of decent. He has cheekbones." She bit her lip. "He might have sent me a naked picture too."

Jensen nearly choked on his pizza. "Naked?"

Gen seemed far less fazed. "What was he doing in this naked picture?"

"Getting to second base with a starfish," she admitted. "But-"

"There is no 'but' that will make that acceptable," Gen cut in. "I love Misha but starfish fetishists are not our target market. He's out."

"But I-"

Humperdinck hissed with displeasure. Danneel dropped the photo and raised her hands in surrender. "Okay, okay, he's out. Please don't let your cat eat my face."

Gen rolled her eyes. "He's not going to eat your face."

Going by the look in Humperdinck's eyes, face-eating was not off the table and Jensen shuffled further down the couch. "So you said you liked number three?"

"Yep," Gen said with enthusiasm. "His name's Aldis. He paints and plays violin and does some kind of really hot martial arts. We took a pottery class together last semester."

Danneel held up the guy's picture. "Plus I hear he's really well hung."

They both stared at her.

"Hey, I hear things," she defended. "What do you think, Ackles?"

"Definite maybe?" he hazarded. "He's the best so far."

"Mmm hmm," Gen agreed with a not entirely wholesome sigh. 

"You want some privacy?" 

Jensen was only half-joking and so was reassured when Gen shook her head. "No, I'm good. Go on to number four."

"Number four would be Daniel." She held up his picture. "According to the handy bio he submitted, he's on the lacrosse team, likes dogs-" Humperdinck meowed in distaste. "-and is a big fan of nature."

"Who doesn't love nature?" Gen deadpanned.

"Well, apparently Daniel here loves it so much that he's perfected his Tarzan jungle cry and his vine-swinging ability." She shook her head. "Man, he's lucky he's hot."

"Tarzan!" Jensen said. He cringed internally at the volume but explained as quick as he could, "Sorry. I just- I thought I recognized him from somewhere. He was Tarzan at the Halloween party we went to last year." He turned to Gen. "He was really obnoxious when he was hitting on you."

"Ohhh," she said as realization dawned. "The 'my dick is a jungle snake' guy. Ew."

"How do you even remember that?" Danneel said. She almost sounded impressed. "You couldn't even remember what you did that night. Except for that whole Coyote Ugly lapdance thing you had going on."

Reminding himself that he'd somehow made it home alive and unmolested that night, he said, "That wasn't my fault. I had a-"

"Reaction to some meds. I know. I gave you lots of sympathy hugs and cocoa that week."

Jensen wished his face didn't go quite so red at the memory. "The Tarzan thing happened at the start of the night," he said. "Before everything got swirly."

"Well, I guess Tarzan boy is out," Gen said. "Who's the last one? Was it Tom?"

"Nope, we cut Tom," Danneel said breezily. "He had an unfortunate tattoo. Number five would be Jared. Tall, plays football, and has thankfully shaved off his terrible sideburns."

"I liked his sideburns!" Gen protested.

"You like Humperdinck," Danneel said. "Your judgment is already super questionable."

Humperdinck hopped back up onto the couch at the sound of his name and Gen cuddled him to her chest. "He's cute."

"He'd destroy the universe if he had opposable thumbs," Danneel said matter-of-factly. "Now put the demon cat down and focus up, Cortese. Do we want Aldis or Jared?"

"Aldis," Gen said. She tilted her head. "No, Jared." She pursed her lips. "No, wait. Aldis."

Danneel rolled her eyes. "Jensen? It's your stuff he's going to be wearing. Do you like Aldis or Jared better?"

Both of them smiled up at him from their awkwardly taken headshots and Jensen pushed his glasses back up his nose. "I don't know," he said. "I feel like I'm at one of those restaurants where you choose which lobster you want. Like, oh, you have a nice face, let me boil you alive and eat your flesh."

Danneel stared at him. "Unless there's something I don't know aboutthe photography process, those two situations are not similar."

Sighing, Jensen tapped his foot nervously against the couch. "I- I can't choose one. What if I choose wrong?"

"There is no wrong," Danneel said. "All you have to do is pick one of these very good-looking guys to try on some knitwear while you take pictures. If it makes you feel any better, Gen will probably leave me and begin a torrid affair with whoever you don't pick, so it's kind of a win-win."

"Hey," Gen protested. "I'd start with inviting him for a threesome first."

"You see?" Setting the pictures in Jensen's lap, she said, "Pick one. Whichever you want."

"Can't you pick?" he asked hopefully.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Gen said. "I'll pick. Harris, how tall are these guys?"

"Aldis is about 6'0''," Danneel said. "And Jared's huge, gotta be 6'5'' at least."

"Go with Jared," she said decisively. Humperdinck pawed at her chest, demanding attention, and she stroked him as Jensen floundered for a long moment. 

"How- Why Jared?" he asked, lost. "I thought you liked Aldis."

"Oh, I do," she said. "And at some point this week, me and Danneel are going to discuss whether threesomes are a realistic possibility-"

"Only if we can get drunk and have one with Misha," Danneel said with a mouthful of pizza.

"But you should go with Jared," Gen continued. "That pink sweater of yours will be fucking tiny on him. It'll be awesome."

Jensen's mouth opened and closed wordlessly as she snagged Aldis' picture from his lap and then grabbed the remote.

"Call him tomorrow and set up a shoot," she said firmly. "Tonight is for bad TV."

Evidently done with the casting process, the two of them turned their attention to some show about teenagers with a lot of feelings. Humperdinck's tail swished back and forth while he kept watch and Jensen found himself looking down at the smiling face of tall, football guy Jared as he muttered under his breath.

"It's a peach sweater."

**+++**

There was something soothing about being behind the camera.

The thick lenses of his glasses provided him with an initial shield but he felt even safer and even more removed when he had the additional layer between himself and the rest of the world. No-one paid attention to him there, always focused on the subject of the photograph rather than the guy taking it, and as he waited for the boathouse door to open, he was more thankful than ever for the weight of the camera in his hands.

He was also thankful for the strap looped around his neck when he jumped at the sharp rap on the door.

The camera slipped from his grip and Jensen wiped his hands on his cargo pants before taking its weight again and calling through the door, "Hello?"

His stomach gave a nervous flutter when a head peeked around the door. The guy had a mess of dark brown hair and a broad smile that Jensen recognized from the headshot he'd spent most of last night staring at. 

"Hey," he said cheerfully. "I'm Jared. I think I'm supposed to be here for a photoshoot?"

Jensen gestured to the camera. "You think right." He gave an awkward wave. "I'm Jensen. Come in."

He'd become well-acquainted with Jared's face the previous evening but as he closed the door and walked into the empty boathouse, Jensen tried to process the whole package. 

Jared kept his shoulders pulled in a little but there was no disguising just how tall he was. He had a few inches on Jensen and Jensen bit his lip as he looked down the length of Jared's body, from the messy sweep of dark hair to the broad shoulders, slim waist, and stupidly long legs. He was dressed in a faded tee, dark jeans and green flipflops, and looked completely at ease as he strolled through the lounge.

Jensen wanted to throw up. He could feel his cheeks heating and his hand shook as he pushed his glasses back up his nose. He was bad at this, bad at any kind of social interaction which didn't involve hiding behind a camera or stamping people's books in the library, and his stomach tightened at the thought of Jared going back to laugh with his friends about what a freak the gay photography guy was.

"Jensen?"

He blinked at the question and cringed when he found Jared watching him with a confused expression on his face. "Yeah?"

Jared's frown smoothed out instantly. "I was just wondering where you wanted me to go." He smiled. "Most of my modeling experience is pulling dumb faces at whatever's next to me."

"Oh." Swallowing hard, Jensen backed up to give himself some breathing space as he looked around. 

Gen was friends with the president of the boat club, who'd given the okay for Jensen to shoot there that afternoon. It was an old building, raised up off the river and with a bar that looked out over the water. The interior reminded him of a hunting lodge, all wood panelling and plush armchairs, but with oars and team photos mounted on the walls instead of deer heads. 

At the time, it had seemed like a great place to shoot but now that it was just him and Jared with the rush of the river outside, Jensen was starting to regret his strategy.

"I figured we'd move around," he said, trying to conjure up some confidence. "See what works and what doesn't. I, uh-" He gestured to the folded clothes that he'd set out along the bar. "That's what we're working with."

Jared moved over to them and Jensen blurted out, "We don't need to use all of them. And most of them are probably the wrong size but I only made one of everything because I didn't think I'd wear them that often and-"

"These are yours?" Jared asked.

Jensen nodded, braced for mockery. "Yeah. I know it's lame, but…"

"Hey, it's neat," Jared said, sounding suspiciously like he meant it. He looked through them carefully, unfolding each of Jensen's sweaters and smoothing his hands over the wool. "I mean, I can't even sew buttons on straight, let alone knit a whole outfit." His eyes brightened as he grabbed a purple beanie. "Man, I love this hat."

He pulled it on and looked over at Jensen with a grin.

Jensen obviously didn't hide his reaction well enough since Jared laughed and pulled it off a second later. "I guess the hat doesn't love me, huh?"

In spite of himself, Jensen smiled. "Try this one," he said, tossing him a black version with a baseball cap type brim. Jared tugged it on and turned to him for approval. "Much better."

"Forehead attractiveness is very important to me," Jared said with feigned sincerity. "So how do we do this? Is there an order? Do I need to show off the, uh, purls or something?"

"The purls?"

"I know nothing about knitting, okay," he said with a self-deprecating grin. "Give a guy points for effort."

"You can have one point," Jensen said. "I'm strict like that." 

Jared laughed and Jensen found himself relaxing a little as he said, "I guess we could start with the sweaters. The black one should fit you okay." He turned away, fiddling with the cap on his camera. "I'll just, uh, give you some privacy."

He heard the rustle of movement behind him as Jared started to change. Moving over to adjust the lights, he heard him call, "Hey, what am I doing with my jeans? Did you have some pants you wanted me to wear or…?"

Jensen tried very hard not to think about a pantsless Jared. "Jeans can stay on," he called back. "It's mostly just top-half stuff. Sweaters, vests, scarves, hats, that kind of thing. Maybe some socks if you're okay with that."

"I can do socks," he said. "My feet are kinda big though -- I don't want to hulk out of your favorite pair or anything."

The rustle stopped and Jensen turned around when Jared said, "So what do you think?"

Jensen had honestly never been so attracted to a guy in knitwear before. The black sweater was thin and light and clung to Jared's biceps in all the right places. The arms were a little short on him but it was big on Jensen and so fit perfectly across Jared's shoulders before falling looser around his waist. It skimmed the waistband of his jeans, giving Jensen a peek of skin with every movement, and his tongue darted out to lick his lips as he stammered, "Good. I- That's good."

Jared smiled, broad and friendly and completely free of mockery, and Jensen ached with how badly he wanted this to go okay.

"Could you maybe push the sleeves up a little?" he asked. "Just to hide how short they are." He waved his hands by way of apology. "I have t-rex arms."

"Hey, those are perfectly respectable raptor arms," Jared said, tugging the sleeves up. "Where do you want me?"

"The bar," he decided. "The part that isn't covered with clothes."

The light caught Jared as he moved over to stand by the bar and Jensen lifted his camera. "Forward some more. No, now back a little." The light fell perfectly across his face and chest, and Jensen held up a hand. "That's good. Now smile, I guess?"

Jared obliged, smiling easily as he snapped the first couple of pictures, but Jensen stopped with a frown. "Maybe try leaning against the bar? Just get comfortable."

Again Jared obliged. The smile seemed to come easier this time as some of the tension left him and Jensen was pleased to discover he wasn't the only one who'd been nervous.

"You do this a lot?" Jared asked as Jensen adjusted the light some more. "Will I be bragging about this in ten years when you're a world famous fashion photographer?"

Jensen laughed. "I don't think you'll be bragging," he said. "I haven't exactly worked out a specialty yet but I mostly do nature stuff. Or sports or concerts or rallies. Stuff where things just happen and I don't have to worry about getting people to pose for me."

"In that case, I'll bring my posing A-game," Jared teased, bending backwards against the bar with a flourish as Jensen snapped a picture. "So what about the other pictures? With the girl?"

"Danneel? That was mostly her doing," he said, gesturing for Jared to turn to the left. "She took the first one herself and then made me do the rest of them when it got popular."

"They were good," Jared said. "At least half the guys on the team have one of them hidden in their locker somewhere."

"She'll be delighted to hear that," Jensen said with a smile. "The hotness is all on her though. I just take the pictures."

"Must be weird though, right?" he said. "With other dudes having your girlfriend's picture under their beds?"

Jensen's stomach tightened. 

"She's not my girlfriend," he said, hoping they didn't get any closer towards the gay issue. His history with football players and his sexuality mostly involved getting shoved into lockers and punched in the face. "But if you're looking to hook up with her, I think it's a lost cause. She has a girlfriend."

He found himself waiting for the all-too-common comeback about how Danneel just needed 'a real man' to show her the light, but blinked in surprise when Jared said, "Oh, hey, no, I wasn't fishing for that." He gave a tiny shrug and admitted, "I'm not exactly into girls anyway."

Jensen was pretty sure his mouth had fallen open but it took him way too long to get his brain in gear to close it. "Y-You're gay?"

Jared's friendly demeanor fell away. "That's not a problem, is it?"

"N-n-no," he stuttered, half-worried that Jared was about to beat him up for being homophobic instead of for being gay. "I-" He swallowed hard. "That's fine."

The friendliness was back a second later. "Great." He curled his arms up in a bodybuilder pose and flashed him a grin. 

"So do you wanna take more pictures in this or should I move on to the peach sweater now?"

**+++**

They did move on to the peach sweater. And the cream one and the red one and the blue cardigan with the ducks on the cuffs.

The afternoon went quicker than Jensen had anticipated as they went through outfit after outfit. Jared was fun and friendly and smart -- apparently he was doing an engineering degree in between being a football star -- and looked ridiculously good in every single outfit he wore, to the point where Jensen was starting to worry about feeling inadequate in his own clothes.

It was one of the best days he'd had in a while and as the time ticked by, Jensen found that he was actually sad that the shoot would be over.

Jared still seemed happy enough to be there as he sprawled on the wooden stairs leading to the upper level of the bar. He was down to Jensen's favorite sweatervest -- camel-colored with buttons on the front -- and was in the middle of telling a story about the time he dressed up as Jessica Rabbit for Halloween while Jensen took the last few pictures.

"But then I was so drunk when I got back to his place that I couldn't work out how to take the dress off," Jared said, tucking a hand behind his head and pulling a joke model face for the camera. "And he wasn't down with having sex while I was dressed like a cartoon rabbit in a floor-length dress so I ended up crashing on the couch like that all night." 

He shook his head as Jensen laughed. "Swear to god, that was the worst walk of shame I have ever done."

Very much enjoying the mental image that walk of shame, Jensen lowered the camera and offered a hand to help Jared off the stairs. "Well, I promise I'll let you get changed into your own clothes before you leave today," he said. "I think we're done, man."

"Really?"

Jensen didn't know if he was imagining it or if Jared really did sound disappointed. 

"Yep," he said, patting him on the shoulder. "You've been through my entire wardrobe."

He didn't bother turning away for privacy reasons as Jared changed back into his t-shirt. Since he'd spent half the afternoon with his chest on display, there wasn't much Jensen hadn't already seen.

"So what happens now?" Jared asked. "With the pictures."

"I go through and pick the best ones, pair them with the pattern and get them out to Misha's buddy to print," he said. "We'll send an email out to the mailing list but it shouldn't be more than a week or so."

Jared nodded. "Awesome."

He turned to slide his feet back into his flipflops and Jensen finally took the chance to ask, "So why did you volunteer for this?" There was a frown on Jared's face when he turned around and Jensen continued, "I mean, I'm assuming most guys wanted to do it to get laid but I can't imagine you'd have any problem in that department."

"Hey, you never know," Jared said seriously. "I might be really terrible in bed."

Jensen actually felt guilty for a second before Jared's mouth curved in a grin. "Kidding. I am very competent sex-haver."

Jensen chuckled. "So why are you here? Do you secretly want to become a model?"

"Hell, no," he said with vehemence, but then ducked his head and rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. "It's actually more embarrassing than that."

Jensen smiled. "What, a dare? A secret love of cardigans?"

Jared wasn't smiling anymore and Jensen's happiness faltered when he looked up and admitted, "I kind of came here to see you."

Jensen's instinctive step backward was a lot less subtle than he had intended.

"I'm sorry," Jared said quickly. "I know that's gotta sound really stalker-ish but I swear it's not like that."

"You came to see me?" Jensen repeated, backing off as Jared took a step forward. "I- Why? How did you even know who I am? No-one knows who I am."

He was aware his voice was bordering on shrill but couldn't seem to control it as Jared looked at him with sympathy. 

"I'm sorry," he said again. "I didn't want to do it like this. I just-"

"How do you know me?" Jensen snapped. Fear slid through him and he glanced around, trying to work out if he could get to the door faster than Jared could catch him. Being alone on the river with a big, strong guy didn't seem so great in retrospect. "What do you want?"

"Honestly?" Jared tried for a smile. "Coffee. Maybe even dinner if you're up for that."

Jensen stopped backing away. "Huh?"

"You wanna sit down?" he asked gently. "I promise I'm not a murderer or anything."

Jensen backed up to lean against the bar but didn't sit down. His heart was still pounding in his chest and his hands stayed wrapped around his camera as he said, "Explain." He gulped. "Please."

He managed to pull in a couple of decent breaths when Jared went to sit on the stairs, putting a better amount of space between himself and Jensen.

"You remember last Halloween?" he asked. "The party at the mansion near Green Pines?"

Jensen closed his eyes as familiar shame swept over him. "Parts of it," he said weakly. "You saw me there?"

He put his head in his hands when Jared nodded. "Yeah."

"I'm not like that normally," Jensen said quickly, "I swear. The bar and the dancing… I don't do that."

"Yeah, I think I got that," Jared said with a smile.

"I didn't mean to do any of it." Jensen was aware he was babbling but couldn't seem to stop. "My friends, they got me to come along because I don't go out with them enough, but I was on medication so when someone put alcohol in my drink, I had a really bad reaction."

"Jensen-"

"And then I danced on the bar and on some guy's lap and possibly made out with an astronaut," he said miserably. "Then I passed out and threw up in my roommate's cowboy hat the next morning."

"Hey now," Jared cut in, still goddamn smiling. "There was at least thirty minutes between the astronaut and the passing out."

Jensen stared at him. "What?" His eyes widened. "Shit, were you the astronaut?"

Jared chuckled. "No, that was my friend. I was the He-Man whose lap you sat on."

If curling up and dying was an actual option, Jensen was pretty sure he would've taken it right then. "Fuck. I'm so sorry," he said, beyond humiliated. "I know it's probably too late but please don't tell anyone else," he begged. "I can't-"

"Hey," Jared said, moving over to rest a hand on Jensen's shoulder. "It's okay. I'm not trying to embarrass you," he promised. "The only thing people remember about that night is that some guy dressed as a cowboy danced on the bar for two minutes." He pursed his lips. "And that some girl in a tortilla outfit spanked a guy in a giant hotdog costume. It was a weird night."

He gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "No-one knows the cowboy guy was you, okay? The only reason I even knew what you looked like is because I walked you home afterwards."

Jensen's panic-fuzzed brain came to a screeching halt. "You what?"

It was Jared's turn to look embarrassed. "I walked you home," he said. "And not for any shady sex reasons, I promise. You were sick and exhausted so you let me help you back to your building. You don't remember any of that?"

Jensen shook his head. "The last thing I remember is the astronaut tasting like grape soda," he said. "Then it's just a blur."

"Let me fill in some blanks," Jared said, leaning against the bar next to him. "You wouldn't tell me your name or what you were studying because you thought I was a Guatemalan spy, but you did tell me you were the mysterious guy behind the knitting patterns." 

He bumped their shoulders together. "For the record, you would be a terrible spy."

"I'm getting that," Jensen said with a small smile. "What else did we talk about?"

"How much we both hated high school," he said. "And how much we both loved Contra. Then we got in a fight about whether it was acceptable to find Channing Tatum hot. You won and I gave you a piggy-back the rest of the way as a reward." He shrugged. "And also because you looked like you were about to pass out."

"Thank you," Jensen said quietly. "I didn't know you did any of that." He looked up at him. "Why did you come here to find me though?"

"Because I didn't know anything else about you," Jared said. "You were seriously not forthcoming with a name. The whole walk back you insisted your name was Cowboy Patrick, which is really not a cowboy name, and I didn't know which room you lived in because one of your friends showed up when we got to your building. The only stuff I knew about you was that you liked knitting and were really not into Channing Tatum."

"He has a weird neck."

"You have weird taste," Jared teased. "Look, I know you're well within your rights to think of me as a creepy stalker but I liked drunk, secretive Jensen. Plus it was really great hanging out with you today."

Jensen's cheeks heated, this time with something other than crippling embarrassment. "It was great hanging out with you too."

"So you think maybe you want to go for coffee sometime?" he asked hopefully. "Or pizza, or Chinese, or drinks, or whatever else you want. I will eat pretty much anything you put in front of me."

Jensen smiled. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"I'll go for coffee with you."

"Really?" Jared sounded surprised by the answer and Jensen laughed when he pumped his fist in delight. "It'll be the best coffee date ever. I'll wear shoes that cover my toes and everything."

Jensen laughed again as he peered down to see Jared wiggle his feet in his flipflops but then looked back up when Jared murmured, "Fuck, I really want to kiss you right now." 

He clapped a hand over his mouth. "Shit, that's so inappropriate, isn't it? I'm sorry, I thought you'd think I was a creep or something, so I'm just really psyched I get to see you again."

Jared's enthusiasm was infectious and Jensen found himself smiling up at him as he loosened his grip on the camera slightly. "I might be okay with that."

Jared did a double-take.

"What?" Jensen said. "You've been nearly shirtless all afternoon." He inched closer. "You look really good in sweatervests."

"Man, now I feel bad for thinking how good you'd look out of them," Jared teased, plucking at Jensen's current outfit. He settled his hands on his hips and met his eyes. "You sure this is okay?"

Jensen decided kissing would be the best way to answer that question.

He closed the gap between them too fast, making their noses bump together when Jared jumped at the sudden jolt of the kiss. Before Jensen could panic and pull away, however, Jared brought his hands up to cup his cheeks and fitted their mouths together with ease. 

His lips were soft and warm against Jensen's as he kissed him slowly. It was more eagerness than experience on Jensen's side but it didn't take long for him to relax under Jared's touch and to let him lead the way. He coaxed his lips apart, letting their tongues slip and curl together, and Jensen let the soothing warmth of Jared's body against his tamp down the thrum of his nerves.

They broke apart too soon but Jensen managed to hide his pout when Jared looked at him with a lopsided smile. "How do you feel about getting that coffee now?"

The 'yes' nearly tripped off Jensen's tongue but he pushed it back as he came back to reality. "I need to pack up here," he said reluctantly. "Also I said I'd check in with my friends when I was done." He summoned up another burst of courage. "I could do dinner tonight though? Uh, if you want to and you're free and-"

"Very free," Jared said, beaming. "And very much wanting to." His smile sparked a pleasant flutter in Jensen's chest which only grew stronger when he reached up to nudge Jensen's glasses back up his nose. "You want any help packing up?"

He shook his head. "I-I'm good. I'll see you tonight though?"

"Pick you up outside your building at 7?"

"7 works," he said. "I live at-"

"I remember," Jared teased.

"Well, I'm in 305 if you want to come up," Jensen said. "Now that I know you're not a Guatemalan spy or anything."

"I hear lack of espionage is important in a relationship," Jared said. "I guess I'll see you later?"

He had his hand on the doorknob before Jensen called after him, "Wait!" Twisting his fingers in the strap of his camera, he asked, "Why don't I remember you from Halloween? I mean, if I remembered the bar and the astronaut, I should've remembered a guy like you. Especially if I was on your lap."

Jared cringed. "Man, I was so hoping you wouldn't ask that."

"Why?"

He ran a hand through his hair with a sigh. "Because I might've dyed my hair blond that night."

Jensen's eyes widened. "You were blond?"

"I was He-Man!" Jared protested. "I was going for authenticity!"

Jensen tried and failed to hide his smirk and Jared shook his head. "Shut up."

"My lips are sealed," Jensen promised. "I'll see you tonight, He-Man."

Jared's smile was warm and gorgeous. "See you tonight, Patrick."

The door swung closed behind him and Jensen let himself sink to a seat in the lounge as he took a deep breath. 

He looked up sharply when the door flew open again and Jared poked his head through. "Just for the record, I do know your name isn't actually Patrick."

Jensen stared at him.

"I just thought I'd, uh, make that clear. Y'know, what with those three months where I didn't know your name and all." He flashed him a bashful grin. Jensen found it pretty endearing. "See you tonight, Jensen."

He vanished again a second later and Jensen smiled to himself as he let his head fall back against the leather of the armchair. The clothes Jared had worn were bundled on top of his duffel bag and the camera hung heavily around his neck, containing dozens of pictures as proof that the afternoon really did happen.

Maybe the softcore knitting pornography hadn't been the worst idea after all.


End file.
